This morning I was jolted out of bed earlier than normal with a warning it was snowing outside and I should leave for work early. At least if I wanted any chance of getting there on time. I dashed out of bed about five minutes later, when the words finally made contact with my tired brain and scrambled to throw my clothes on. I swiftly tie my hair back in a ponytail, put on my tall winter boots and a pair of jeans with a dressy sweater, brush my teeth, grab my greens and dash out the door! Nope, not even time for a quick shower. I knew immediately it was just going to be one of those days.
Rubber met the wet road at 6 am! I was off to try and beat the traffic, on my snowy, 45-minute commute to work. I beat the traffic, which was the good thing. The not so good thing was when I used the restroom shortly after getting to work, I noticed my underwear were on inside out! What?? This pretty much never happens. Yep, it was just going to be one of those days!
The day ended slightly before 7 pm as I was winding down a conversation with a fellow co-worker, where I confess that this job is just not where my life is headed. I do not want to be a paper pusher in a mill factory I was not really sure mattered anyway. I want to be out in the world helping people because I have come to the conclusion people matter! So I lead this double life where I am a paper pusher and hand holder three days a week and I spend the rest of the week studying to be a counselor. On the weekends I volunteer my time with veterans who have PTSD. Yes, sometimes I feel crazy.
On certain occasions, I feel as though I struggle with a split personality while trying to work a job which is no longer me and is often unrewarding, while simultaneously studying and volunteering my way to being a counselor. A job I am passionate about! A job which fuels a fire in me, making me feel alive, as well as productive. A job that has value. To me, it has great value. I have a long way to go and much to learn. Yet it is exciting and scary. I am trying not to rush the journey of growth and learning, but at the same time, I am impatient to be in the field doing the job. I want to be there yesterday! Is yesterday a real goal? Of course not! Too much to do, too much to learn, too many years of practicing before I can take the test to become a Licensed Professional Counselor.
So yes, I remind myself to slow down and enjoy the journey. To look at the job I have now as a means to an end. To be patient for the eventual reward. It will come.
The point to my somewhat embarrassing story is this: Some days will be “just one of those days!” No matter how put-together a person is, they too will experience these types of days. Where nothing seems to go right. Where even though they put their pants on one leg at a time just like everyone else, this one particular morning they may accidentally get their underwear put on inside out. They may look put together and even act put together on the outside, but on the inside, they may be feeling a little crazy! A little out of sorts and a little embarrassed at what they know, that no one else knows.
So here are my tidbits:
– Everyone, and I mean just about everyone, has these types of days. So try not to be so hard on yourself when it happens.
– Learn to laugh at yourself. It is healthy and doing so may just turn your day around.
-Not everything that looks like a disaster, is in fact, a disaster. So take the time to sort it out.
-Do not assume someone else is having a good day, just because they appear put together. It is impossible to know what is going on inside for them. (The old adage of, do not judge a book by its cover.)
I hope this made you laugh and I hope it made you think!